93. Hold hands more often
94. Reenact a romantic movie you watched together.
95. Always open the door for your female partner and be a gentleman.
96. Always remember that being romantic comes from the heart.
97. Although the idea counts, its the actions that follow that make it special.

Pretty good, huh?  Do you want to find out the rest?  Just visit romance4u

Why is it the guy is in the background?  Why not have him as a flamenco peacock?  A dance of equals?  In my review I talked of the supportive role the man had to bring her energies to the front.  That set off a contrast of ideas that I needed to turn over and over to gain a full view of this dance of life.

You see, what the man is providing is the “sacred space” — Sacred,  not so much as in the religious sense,  but as in the sense that it is so precious that it must be protected at all costs, so the space can work it’s magic.  And what is that magic?

The magic is that the woman can blossom into the fullest realization of her potential.  As she can define it.  But it is not just man an woman, it is power, and beauty: Yang, and Yin.

So what qualities make up this sacred space?  The Yang energy must create it and enlarge it and defend it.  The Yin energy must fill it with the delights of the Yin: the highest refinement of  her energies.  Beauty and richness and grace.  The protection of the yang must surround the space, and may dance within the space, but within that space, the  Yin is allowed, encouraged and nurtured to flourish unrestrained.  Anything less makes it the dank prison and not the sacred space.

It is easy for the dominate energy to turn inward to rule over the space,  but unless that energy enlarges the space and makes is more to the liking of the Yin, it is useless.  This is how many men direct their frustrations with the  world back into their home life, and make the woman a prisoner, a slave.  A truly strong man would  not do that.

Equally sad is when the Yang energy is muted, by job loss, or illness, or emotional exhaustion, and can no longer keep the space pure and open.  The Yin energy is no longer able to be pure Yin,and unless the pair can change over, and allow the  Yin to repair, the dance will dissolve.

Yang!  Be strong: allow your mate the space to grow, and  thrive and blossom.  You will harvest a crop of blessings.  Yin: Take every advantage of the space while it lasts, enjoy it , expand your capabilities, and know you are loved: make the space within a loving nest for your mate to recuperate.

And if, by some sad chance that you need to exchange roles, become as receptive to the needs of the Yang, as it was of yours

Here is a poem that I will send out to the whole world, so that you can know what a puppy might hope that love could grow up to be.

Without that!?!

Without that?! I must be your lover for all time…
Knowing your love not in this way will frame my death.

Without that, I must be your love for all time…
Knowing your love not in this way will mute my senses.

Without that, I must be your best friend for all time…
Knowing you not in this way will harden my heart.

Without that, I must be your friend for all time…
Knowing you not in this way will destroy my soul.

Happy Valentines Day: There are more searches on Google for Love near Valentines Day, than all the other days of the year! Valentines Day is truly the day of love. Let it be so.

Buy From Art.com

Look at the color of the dress, the swing and sway of the energies of this dance. This has got to be one of the most sensual and sexy images I’ve seen in years. Sophisticated too. Totally expressing that fabulous soul dance.

The whole image exudes movement and life. The sweep of dress and the lean of the dancers vibrate with erotic energy. There is no pretense of holding back on what may come later in the evening.

There are some important lessons about romance for us students to contemplate:

• The guy is totally in control. But he is NOT the center of attention. He does this so that she may shine her radiance to herself, her partner and all that see.
• The woman has total faith that she is in trustworthy hands. She would never let herself be bent in this unnatural way unless she has surrendered to her partner in this.
• Both of them are totally focussed on the connection to each other and the sensuality of the moment.

So ask yourself these questions: As a guy, can your partner totally trust you? Would you ever let her lose faith in you? Even if she doesn’t follow your lead? Do you let her shine? Are you totally focussed on her and just enjoy the moment with her?

And as a woman: could you trust your man? or do you hold back? Would you like to shine more? or do you hold back? Are you totally focussed on each moment with your partner, or do you multiplex your energies?

If you like the image and what it means, go ahead and click through: you will find many sizes and frame options for your selection. Let it inspire you to a more sensual and complete romance.

Jim

I won’t speak about God’s plan. I think we are all bathed in God’s plan each and every second of our entire lives — Hint: It’s not in a book folks, books are written by men, not God.

I won’t speak about what sin is the worst, although why would one think that an unfaithful lover is worse than a sadistic killer, I have no idea.

And again, if you can’t forgive your partner, even a cheating partner, then you have no clue about what unconditional love is all about.

But Jenny Block is not about cheating. Far from it. She is about exercising her ability to grow in directions that most people fear. And more power to her! Bravo.

Now would you feel threatened by a partner that openly desires, and has other lovers? Very likely you would. But you could not accuse that partner of cheating. All you could do would be to look at yourself and ask what is it that is bothering me about this?

Here is a new way to look at the fidelity question. And I don’t think most people have even begun to think about love and partnership in this way, but it is a new start —

Do not judge your partner by how she or he treats others, judge only by how your partner treats you.

Look at that statement. Read it. Commit it to memory. Bring it close to your heart. The more you attempt to restrict your partner, the less whole you are. Remember it only your neediness that attempts to force another to your rules. And neediness is never romantic.

Does that mean that you must enjoy a partner’s extra-curricular activities? Absolutely not. In fact, if you have a truly deeply held value about monogamy, there are plenty of people in the partner pool that share that value. A partner that slips, has an affair, or visits a prostitute, it only means that your partner is not honoring one of your deepest values. But your option is to tell your partner how much it hurts, how it hurts, and allow a mending or parting of the ways. Or you an grow into a new set of values.

In fact, allowing yourself the freedom that you extend to your partner will allow your partner to grow and realize the value of the gift of acceptance that you offer. Now that’s unconditional love, and unconditional love is the most romantic of all.
But what ever your preferences about monogamy, swinging or whatever, be clean and safe. Be responsible.

So, thanks, Jenny for stepping up and sharing your new way of pursuing life’s peak experiences.

Well somebody actually asked me the same thing: “Jim, what do YOU think romance is?” Well, I had to think a few moments, and here it is:

Romance, I’m sure, is the path and destination, the life long pursuit of life’s peak experiences. The destination is togetherness, the path is a mountain of salt that we may eat together. Romance is watching your eyes as you look at shoes on the rack or stars or concerts and noticing what makes your face light up in pleasure: and bringing that look back into your eyes by future words, deeds and thoughts.

Romance is making you always feel safe and protected no matter how crazy the adventure gets; That we can always survive and thrive. Romance is allowing you to be an eternal little child, adolescent, seductress, mommie, slut, matron and crone at your whim, and reveling in the kaleidoscope of your personality. Romance is the confidence to let you grow in whatever ways you need, with whatever resources you choose, and knowing that you will be a better partner for all that.

That, my reader, you flower of thorns, is romance for me, pernonally. I learned it from Joan Armatrading’s ‘Willow.’ — go out and buy her tunes!

It is a tough road to travel. Don’t expect to do it without some serious growth on your part.

However, you will find that there are some universal attributes about romancing your partner, man or women.

1. Find something your partner really values. This part
   is easier if you and your partner have a common set
   of important values.
2. Provide that something even if that is really difficult.
   This part is easier if you (and your partner) have got-
   ten rid of most of your hang-ups.
3. See how it works and go back to step 1 all over again
   with something different. This part is easier if you
   and your partner have a commitment to keep trying.

Seems simple, but it takes patience, and work. The phrase “this part is easier” is exactly what the Celarien Experience is all about. Using the power of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) is an effective way to address exactly these portions of your romantic future. The e-book Romantic Trances available there is full of ways for you to get the essential “this part is easier” into your romance — relationship, life achievement, building tall buildings with your name on the front, liberating a whole nation, anything.

Go check ‘em out. You will be impressed.

Another post gives us a PG-13 version of the red dress and how it spices up love for this lucky guy. Read it and you will get steaming ideas of your own. I guarantee it.

Here is a fun, fun site to start you rolling. A good kiss is a true delight and Kate over at The Nicest Kiss has put up an incredible selection of movie clips of incredible kisses. Kate is asking also advice for shy kissers. You go Girl!

Get Romantic

Go for the swill, stay for the forum at Get Romantic has real advice and tips as well as the usual forum swill:

• Q: What do you think about Tantra?
• Answer 1: I’ve never tried it
• Answer 2: The classes should be talking

Talking? Tantra? Tantra is definitely a contact sport. There is some pretty good humor (the kind that is intentional), they mention that the number of calories burned:

• PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
• With an erection…………………………….6 Calories
• Without an erection……………………3,315 Calories

In a word? This site is fun!

Loving Whisper

If you can stand all the Google Ad links (Way too many!!) the Loving Whisper has a crazy patchwork quilt of resources. Love Letters, Stories, Dedications, Quotes, Cards and Poems.
They even have a bunch of SMS cell-phone text messages: here’s one: If i were a tear in ur eye i wood roll down onto ur lips.But if u were a tear in my eye i wood never cry as i wood be afraid 2 lose u!. A fun site: just beware of the off site links: not quite as bad as a porno site, but still way too many!

And a hiss for savvy romance

Another site, actually a very well polished one, with some pretty solid advice, isn’t playing the internet game, though. It seems that savvy romance gets articles from various e-zine sites, and removes the hyperlinks.

You see, the authors put those articles on the e-zine type of site specifically for the links pointing back to the author’s real site. Here at Romance Capitol, we like e-zine’s and we have used that content several times (like Christine Akiteng, Barbara Calvi or Lee Baucom)

This kind of ‘you point to me, I point to you gives more visibility to the author and so raises that author’s worth in the internet world. When a site like ‘savvy romance’ uses the information simply to get the text to make ‘savvy romance’ more visible to the search engines. The best you can say is that SavvyRomance doesn’t quite plagiarize. The old internet crashed in 2000 (possibly out of fear of the coming next 8 years) and it took the imagination of the bloggers to come up with a scheme to raise us out of the ashes. Internet 1.0 sites like ‘savvy romance’ think there is some advantage in not playing by the new rules.

But maybe I’m wrong: What do you think?